37 ridiculously funny housewarming gifts guaranteed to make the new apartmentowners laugh their butt off 37 ridiculously funny apartmentwarming gifts guaranteed to make the new homeowners laugh their butt off

The 80s Mistaken Lyrics Coasters

Raise your hand if you've been personally embarrassed belting out the mistaken lyrics printed on these coasters in front of your friends in the car. Now bring that hand down and buy the coasters so everyone can have more laughs at your embarrassment.

$32 .00

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#2

Breasts Shower Gel Dispenser

Your man just bought a house, if he hasn't scored a babe already, he doesn't have the cash to take ladies out on dates. These are the only ta-tas he'll be touching for a while, but lucky for him, he'll be touching them a lot. Every time he's in the shower, he'll need them to soap up.

$19 .99

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#3

Thought Provoking Questions To Answer While You Poop

The ride on the toilet train can be a long one and if the deuce caboose is nowhere in sight, put your thinking cap on with this book. Thought Provoking Questions To Answer While You Poop delivers exactly what its title suggests, a series of epiphany-inducing topics and prompts to get you contemplating on the crapper.

$9 .99

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#4

White Trash Cooking Recipe Book

When you're forking over cash for a mortgage, you're not gonna have much leftover for food. Why not cook up a raccoon? With the White Trash Cookbook in your kitchen, you'll be whipping up a number of off-the-wall recipes that are tried, true, and straight from the mountains of Appalachia.

$12 .99

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#5

Nic Cage Sequin Flip Pillow

A house is not a home until Nic Cage takes a spot of honor on the couch. All the better if he does so accompanied by an ocean of sparkly blue sequins that flip over to reveal his glorious face. Yes, this is the pillow you've been waiting for.

$10 .99

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#6

The Book Of Useless Information

It's very important when you get a house that you don't start talking about boring stuff like water heaters and replacing the roof. The Book of Useless Information will save you from boring convos and introduce thousands of new topics and fun facts into your party talk arsenal.

$14 .59

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#7

Bud Buddies Gnome Statue

Tell the neighbors that you're 420 friendly (as long as they have the good sense not to come knocking to steal your bud) with the Bud Buddies gnome. The statue is resin-cast to last a lifetime and is equipped with LED lights to make the bong glow.

$54 .99

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#8

Bug Catcher Vacuum

It doesn't matter if you're technically an adult, spiders are f*cking scary and there's no reason you should have to get a flip-flop to smash it. With the bug catcher vacuum, you can suck it off the wall from a safe distance and take it outside to let it free (it's good karma).

$20 .95

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#9

Puking Cat Gravy Boat

Your mother-in-law has been complaining about the gravy boat that her own mother-in-law got her for her wedding eons ago. Give her something even funnier to complain about with this puking cat gravy boat. It's blue, it comes in black, gray, and white, and holds 3oz of gloppy liquid.

$25 .99

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#10

Yankee Candles for Men

He might have a Man Cave, but there's no reason it needs to smell like an actual cave. Yankee Candles for men put the "man" back in "candle" (aka mandle) with scents like First Down, Riding Mower, and 2x4. The scents are delightful and cover-up BO better than Febreeze could ever hope to.

$27 .99

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#11

Retro Vinyl Coasters

If you were born in the '80s, you're probably old enough to own a home AND remember what these funny-looking devices are. For you younguns, these are called vinyls and that device is a record player designed to look exactly like the larger version. There are six coasters in the set and they are equipped with anti-skid bottoms.

$11 .99

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#12

The Redneck Plunger

A redneck diet calls for a redneck plumbing solution. It looks like you could blast a loon outta the sky with this Redneck Plunger, but it'll actually blast a poo straight outta your pipes. Just pull the trigger and BLAM, it's like last night's jerky and Mountain Dew binge never happened.

$48 .29

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#13

Horse Head Squirrel Feeder

It's inevitable that squirrels will descend on your new home and try to take over the bird feeder. Prevent the Bird Wars from starting by giving the squirrels their own special feeder. This horsehead is specially made to fit the adorable rodents and can be filled with their favorite seeds.

$27 .99

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#14

Cactus Coaster Holder

Even if you can't keep a plant alive to save your life, you'll get to watch this cactus thrive. The wooden coaster holder and coast set lives for being taken apart and put back together to keep your coffee table safe from water rings.

$13 .90

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#15

Little Box of Obscenities Magnetic Poetry Kit

The housemate, spouse or otherwise, deserves nothing less than several F-bombs directed at them if they put the empty milk gallon back in the fridge. Ergo, when you need it most, the 72 swears in this box of Magnetic Poetry Obscenities has got your back when you need to leave a pointed message.

$8 .95

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#16

The Bob Ross Toaster

"There's nothing wrong with having a toaster as a friend," is totally something Bob Ross would say. And the friend that you treat to this toaster will feel the same way. No pressure, though, if you don't think they'd smile seeing his happy face every morning, you can treat them to a toaster that makes a regular impression.

$37 .00

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#17

Cat Butt Tissue Dispenser

Scare the sh*t outta your cat with a life-size tissue dispenser that has a serious dingleberry. Choose a tabby or a calico to place overtop your box of tissues. There's a well-placed hole in its rear to deliver tissues you can use to wipe your whiskers.

$44 .99

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#18

How to Fix Everything for Dummies

As soon as the ink is dry on the mortgage, you gotta fix your own sh*t. Your buddy can use all the help he can get from How to Fix Everything for Dummies, which will teach him how to do minor, and even slightly impressive home repairs.

$24 .99

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#19

The Bathroom Guestbook

If there's any amount of alcohol at the housewarming party, there are bound to be bathroom guests. Instead of staring mindlessly at their phone, they can craft and write out a thoughtful message in The Bathroom Guestbook and leave their mark in more ways than just a streak in the bowl.

$9 .99

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#20

The Giant Pepper Mill

You’ve heard of Salt Bae, now get ready for Pepper Bae. Instead of sprinkling a bit of the spicy flecks over your shoulder, you’ll serve it up gourmet style via this massive pepper mill. It’s almost 4 feet tall, so large you could reasonably use it as a baseball bat.

$2,306 .00

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#21

Pooping Pooches Calendar

Did you know that dogs make eye contact with humans when they poo because they feel vulnerable and want to know that everything will be OK? Did you also know that with the Pooping Pooches calendar on the wall everything will be ok because you can start the day with a smile?

$16 .99

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#22

Loch Ness Monster Soup Scoop

You can't make a Loch-mess when you're cooking with the Loch Ness monster scoop. The cute little scoop stands right up in the pot for easy access and double as a mixer and server.

$19 .95

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#23

Don't F Up The Table Drink Coasters

If you're old enough to have a mortgage, you're old enough to care what happens to your coffee table. Water rings BEGONE with these Don't F*ck Up the Table stone coasters. Each has a cork base so your coffee table will remain free of scratches as well.

$19 .00

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#24

Al Dente - The Singing Floating Pasta Timer

Al Dente is swimming with the farfalle, but don't worry about the macaroni mobster, he'll sing like a canary to keep your noodles safe. The clever pasta timer whistles at different pitches to let you know when your pasta is ready to come out of the water, or if it needs a few more minutes.

$24 .99

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#25

Axe Shaped Pizza Cutter

Make like Gimli and wage war with an axe. Thankfully, you're not knocking off orcs, you're just trying to chop a pizza. Either way, this axe will take care of the job. The kitchen tool is equipped with a roller in the axe's blade that slices through pizza like butter.

$5 .59

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#26

Dinosaur Head Shower Head

You didn't buy a whole damn house so you could put classy things like rainwater shower heads in it. Oh no, it's time to live some dreams and dreams always involve dinosaurs. This showerhead looks like a T-Rex skull (awesome), has 9 nozzles (cool), and is water-efficiency compliant so you can feel good about using it (extra awesome!).

$34 .99

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#27

Hot Dog Toaster

Take yourself out to the ballgame any old day by ditching your boring toaster and replacing it with this hot dog toaster. The bright red appliance looks so happy and it'll make you feel overjoyed when you can cook two hot dogs and two buns evenly all at the same time!

$31 .94

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#28

B*tch I Am the Secret Ingredient Funny Oven Mitt

Be the witch of the kitch' and craft some batter and bakes so magical people will swear they're potions all thanks to this oven mitt. Any time anyone asks, they can talk to the hand that's wearing this mitt because the rest of you is too busy making your sweet sorcery.

$16 .99

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#29

Naughty Barbecue Forks

My, what a nice wiener you have, and that pair of mallows you have are equally impressive. Make a good time s'more fun with some buns and graham crackers when you're toasting and roasting your backyard snacks with these naughty skewers.

$29 .98

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#30

Angry Mom Microwave Cleaner

Mama's only mad because you didn't clean the microwave before it got to the point that you had to use her to loosen up the goo. This genius microwave cleaner uses the power of steam to make cleaning even the most baked-on nastiness as easy as wiping away a pile of crumbs.

$9 .99

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#31

A Bathroom Book For People Not Pooping Or Peeing

The bathroom is more than a place to relieve yourself, it's a place to get some thinking done. With this book on hand to read, the Chamber of Thought will live up to its name. The meditative guide is designed to give users a relaxing and rejuvenating experience that soothes social anxiety.

$4 .99

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#32

420 Gourmet Cannabis Cook Book

Cooking with cannabis is much more fun in the comfort of a home that you have the deed to. Get gourmet with your 420 flavors with a little help from this cookbook. These recipes are carefully crafted to tamp down the smell and taste of cannabis and highlight the other flavors that you're cooking with.

$31 .79

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#33

Have a Nice Day Hidden Message Mug

This mug is the equivalent of customer service voice, which is basically how you talk to people in the morning before coffee anyway. The ceramic mug holds 14oz of coffee, which is probably enough to wake you up a little, and comes in three colors.

$12 .95

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#34

Bath And Shower Wine Glass Holder

When all the furniture has been moved and it's finally time to kick back, enjoy some wine in the tub and don't worry about spilling it thanks to this wine glass holder. The holder perfectly cradles a glass of wine and suction to the side of the tub securely.

$14 .95

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#35

Giant Tortilla Blanket

Turn yourself into a taquito with a giant tortilla blanket and experience the warmth and love that only a burrito can bring. If this 71" flannel wrap smelled like bread, you'd try to eat it, that's how real it looks.

$19 .99

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#36

I'll Feed All You Effers Apron

When a man becomes a homeowner, the next stop on the road to true adulthood is to become a grillmaster. Keep things on the patio light and fun with an apron that swears like a sailor while simultaneously protecting your bro from getting burnt. The heavy-duty cotton apron even has pockets!

$16 .99

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#37

Watermelon Tap Kit

You're not living in a frat house, you're living in a real house and real adults drink out of real fruit. With this watermelon tap kit, you can drink fresh and fruit alcoholic beverages straight out of a big piece of fruit filled with liquor.

$24 .99

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#38

Naughty Wine Bottle Stopper

This is another one of those times when c*ckblocking is actually a really good thing. No one wants stale wine, but this naughty wine bottle stoppers sizeable wiener creates an airtight seal between bottle and environment to keep your wine fresh for days.

$9 .99

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#39

Bear Paw Oven Mitts

Your oven is a den and you don't have to be afraid of reaching inside with these bear paw oven mitts on your hands. They're so realistic they even have mini claws at the end. As a bonus, the pads and toe beans are made from silicone, so you can get a good grip on your food.

$21 .99

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#40

Guacamole Serving Bowl

Put some guaco on your taco and serve it out of the very thing the guac is made from. This clever guacamole serving bowl holds over a half-pound of dip and has a lid to keep the guac from browning. It's handpainted to ensure every piece is unique.

$22 .99

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#41

Split Decision Pie Pan

Save dessert, save a marriage with the split decision pie pan. He wants blueberry, she'll kill a man for pumpkin, but everyone will be safe, sound, and satiated thanks to this non-stick pan with a ridge in the middle that allows the baker to make 1 whole pie with 2 halves, each in a different flavor.

$16 .33

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#42

Toilet Timer

You don't want to be "that guy" that spends too much time in the bathroom, and the Toilet Timer can save you from that. The simple device is filled with sand that takes five minutes to drain from bottom to top, which is more than can be said for your intestines. Eat some fiber, already!

$16 .99

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#43

Ravioli Spoon Rest

Do you just unravel at the thought of getting sauces on your precious granite countertops? Re-ravel thanks to ravioli! This adorable spoon rest is a simple piece of silicone colored to look like the oh-so-tasty stuffed pasta. It's dishwasher safe, it'll never break, and it won't slip. Just like pasta, it's the best.

$13 .90

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#44

Pun-ny Salsa Gift Set

Give the guests at the fiesta something to taco about with a bowl full of pun-ions. The ceramic bowl's rim speaks the truth, this is nacho ordinary salsa and nacho ordinary gift set. It's full of jokes and a mex-ellecnt spoon for scooping salsa or guac.

$20 .00

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#45

Crochet Cat Butt Coasters

You can't go wrong covering the house in cat butts. Especially not when there are 8 different colors to choose from. And even more so when each sports a bright pink butthole.

$29 .99

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#46

Farm Animal Butt Magnets

Butts are funny and you can never have enough of them. It's just a fact. Your buddy may have a stainless steel appliance now instead of one that looks straight outta 1975, but that doesn't mean he couldn't use some childlike flair on it. There are six butts in this magnet set, and twelve legs if that matters.

$18 .00

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#47

Emoji Poo Plunger

Drop a monster deuce and keep your pipes good and loose with a little help from the emoji poo plunger. This happy dude sucks in the best way possible and will rocket any logs outta your pipes so you can flush freely.

$195 .03

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#48

Poo-Pourri Toilet Spray

Hide your shame under the delightful scent of flowers or citrus with a simple spritz of Poo-Pourri. The "Before You Go" spray coats the top of the water with a magic formula that makes the air smell more aromatic than ass-tastic.

$8 .49

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#49

Mr. Sneezy Egg Separator

Mr. Sneezy's cold is not contagious, it's cont-egg-ious! And that's a good thing. This gross AF ceramic container is your secret to the best omelets, quiches, baked goods, and other delightful egg-based dishes. His nostrils separate the whites from the yolks, while his head holds onto those yolks for later.

$14 .99

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#50

Hand Cell Phone Holder

Your phone is so used to being in your hands at this point that if you lay it on the table, it's gonna have some serious separation anxiety. Use this clever cell phone holder instead, which will cradle it with love and hold it at the perfect angle for you to see your notifications.

$29 .95

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