37 LOL-Worthy Dirty Santa Gifts That Are The Perfect Mix Of Naugthy And Nice

Cooking With Semen

When you're looking to cook with some of that "special sauce" and none of your dinner party attendees have a nut allergy, cook with semen! It's smooth, it's salty, it's in the 100 delicious recipes in this book. JUST KIDDING! That would be weird, but that's exactly why this makes a great Dirty Santa gift.

$7 .99

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#2

Snow Globe Sweaters

Baby, it's cold outside and when the air gets a little bit nipply, give the girls a break! Wrap them up in these snowglobe sweaters, your nips won't be cooler than cool or ice-cold, they'll be cozy and warm.

$11 .99

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#3

Twerking Santa Claus

The big man's got some junk in his trunk and we're not talking about the big sack he's got in the back of his sleigh. He does, however, slay as this hilarious twerking toy. He stands at 18" tall and shakes his booty with the flip of a switch.

$39 .99

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#4

Dirty Santa Lipstick

Put some paint on the ol' barn and get yourself to your next Dirty Santa party in style with this lipstick in your bag. You'll have 12 hues to choose from, and you'll love the unique shape of the stick that'll give you that fresh, DSL style.

$11 .99

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#5

How To Live With A Huge Penis

Ladies, you will never know the trauma of walking around with a trouser trombone betwixt your gams. And what a gift that is. Throw this book in the ol' Dirty Santa giveaway and the gent in your life might have his happiest New Year yet.

$12 .08

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#6

The People of Walmart Coloring Book Dirty Santa Edition

The holidays are a very special time of year at Wal-Mart and whether you've worked there or shopped there, you've probably seen some things. Witness them all again in a whole new way with a coloring book inspired by the iconic social media account.

$11 .99

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#7

White Trash Cooking Recipe Book

To seek revenge on the reindeer that ran her over, grandma might want to consult this cookbook for some recipes. It's packed with recipes straight outta Appalachia that anyone who doesn't live in the mountains needs to try. It's downhome country, and slightly weird, cooking at its finest.

$12 .99

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#8

Buzzed Blocks Drinking Party Game

Jenga, but make it raunchy. The Buzzed Blocks drinking game has blocks printed with 54 prompts that'll have you and your fellow players swaying as much as your too-tall tower.

$21 .87

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#9

The Animal Penis Book

They call it a dirty Santa party for a reason, throw a couple of naughty gifts on the pile. The Animal Penis book, well, it kinda describes it all in the title. It’ll be responsible for a lot of tears of laughter this holiday season.

$15 .99

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#10

But… You’re A Horse Romance Novel

A horse is a horse, of course, of course, unless that horse is your loyal steed, your knight in an old leathery saddle, your LOVER! Is it conventional? Neigh. Is it a fantastic parody that'll have you rolling on the floor laughing from start to finish? Yay.

$12 .99

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#11

Croc Nuts

Bare Crocs? In this day and age? Nah, you need your footwear to be fashionable and if you’ve got the balls to hang these nuts from the strap on the back of your slip-ons, you’ll be cracking people up wherever you go. The family jewels bounce up and down as you walk, what fun!

$9 .99

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#12

Thought Provoking Questions To Answer While You Poop

You've found it, the book that'll make you leave your phone outside the bathroom. Thought Provoking Questions is filled with so many inquiries that you'll sit on the can for so long people will think you got lost and your ass will go numb.

$9 .99

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#13

The Screaming Goat

Imagine all the fun you could have caroling if you brought this little dude along. The Screaming Goat lives up to his name, just press a button on its base and it'll howl through every Fa-La-La-La-La.

$7 .96

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#14

The Dick Pic Stick

It doesn't matter if you're a grower or a shower, the Dick Pic Stick is gonna be your ace in the hole. Guys at the party will be in stitches over this ruler, which has twelve inches packed in a nine-inch length. Basically, that means his dick will look about 25% longer.

$19 .95

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#15

LED Light-up Knitted Ugly Sweater Hat

Get too lit to quit this holiday season with an ugly sweater hat that's so comfortable you won't wanna take it off when you get inside. The hat is super warm, playful AF, and the key piece your wardrobe needs to make this Christmas your most fashionable yet.

$14 .99

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#16

Hairy Gut Fanny Pack

Hoboy looks like somebody had a few too many of mom's Christmas cookies! This hairy guy fanny pack transforms any rad bod into a dad bod with just the click of the belt. And, it expands to hold more crap, just like your man's beer gut.

$7 .59

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#17

Fish Sandals

All those lords a leaping must've had some super sore feet, too bad they can't play Dirty Santa and win these fish sandals. The foam fishies float in case you lose them in the lake and cushion your tootsies with every step.

$21 .88

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#18

Ball Buffer Cloth Gag Gift

Polish your knob with the Ball Buffer and the ornaments on the tree won't be the only ball blindingly reflective. Make the dude in your life howl with this gag cloth as part of the Dirty Santa swap.

$11 .95

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#19

Dissolving Swim Prank Shorts

When a guy hits the hot tub after wearing these shorts, oof, he's gonna get one helluva surprise. The swim trunks are made of a special thread that disintegrates on contact with water. They're no more concealing than cotton candy in the pool.

$44 .99

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#20

Apple Pie to Fart Smell Prank Candle

Picture this candle for the picture-perfect family, lighting it before a lovely afternoon baking cookies together. For the first few hours it'll smell as sweet as granny's apple pie but then, the scent wil evolve into the desperate aroma of an airport bathroom after a flight that catered burritos.

$14 .99

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#21

Most Likely To Funny Party Game

Most Likely To is like Senior Superlatives but so much more fun because it's that much more NSFW. Instead of "most likely to succeed" you'll have options like "most likely to wake up with a burrito in bed" and that sounds so much more fun.

$17 .99

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#22

Pull My Finger Farting Santa

Real talk, it's not reindeer and Christmas magic keeping Santa's sleigh in the air, it's the big man's butt bombs. Kids and adults will be rolling every time they tug on this little dude's finger and he lets rip a fart that'll make the dog cringe.

$19 .99

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#23

Well Hung Funny T-Shirt

The dudes at the party will be fighting over this shirt, which almost seems like kind of a dick-measuring contest. For obvious reasons, this shirt is exactly the one they'll want to wear at every party, every sports game, and on every errand.

$16 .99

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#24

Light Saber Chopsticks

The Force is with whoever decides to eat with these lightsaber chopsticks. They're available in three light colors and have magnets on the end in case you wanna turn them into one long spear. PS we hear it works great for Cheetos and Doritos in addition to sushi.

$12 .97

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#25

Wacky Waving Inflatable Tube Guy

Get wild and get wacky this Christmas with a dude that will party hardy even after everyone else has gone to bed. You've seen him at the car wash and now you can see him on your desk flailing around every day.

$11 .66

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#26

The World's Hottest Gummy Bear

It's that time of year when everyone is caught up in naughty and nice and while this lil bear may look very nice, he hides a naughty secret. Take a bite and you'll hastily learn what 9 million Scovilles feels like. Grab Santa's milk and cookies you naughty sweet tooth, you.

$8 .99

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#27

Drunk Stoned or Stupid Party Game

Depending on the company you keep, all three categories these cards need to be assigned to could apply. The hilarious party game will have you and the Christmas crew rolling with every pull and prompt.

$17 .99

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#28

Pooping Pooches Calendar

Talk about lumps of coal! Pooping Pooches is the hilarious gag calendar that's been missing from your life. Each month you'll be treated to a new pup perched precariously over his choice of dumping ground.

$16 .99

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#29

Corgi Butt Car Tissue Dispenser

Having a runny nose isn't a bummer when you've got a corgi butt to pull tissues out of. This fluffy butt has the exact curves, cuteness, and soft, pillowy qualities of a corgi butt and fits over a standard square tissue box.

$14 .99

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#30

Hot Dog Toaster

Throw your old toaster away, there's a new one in town! This bright red hot dog warmer can cook a meal within minutes and requires nothing more than a quick press of a button.

$31 .94

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#31

Potty Fisher Toilet Game

Santa's gonna spend a few extra minutes at your house this year so he can take a dump and play with the Potty Fisher Toilet Game. Thanks to magnets and an easy-to-set-up mini pool, you'll have hours of entertainment on the can. Plus, a do not disturb sign is included to chase away interlopers.

$19 .99

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#32

Santa's Stocking Flask

The tree's not the only thing getting lit this year, especially when these stockings are hanging from the mantle. The plastic flask holds 2.25L of liquid and is ideal for wine or mixed drinks.

$8 .99

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#33

The Cheese Printer Prank Gift Box

If you manage to find a gift that's as gouda as this one, don't brie boastful and brag about your gift-giving prowess. What is the gift exactly? Sadly, it's just an empty box so you can't actually print cheese with a picture, but you can fool your friends into thinking that's what they're getting.

$9 .99

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#34

Fred Pizza Saw Wheel

Everyone will be all abuzz over this very clever pizza cutter. The slicer contains a super sharp wheel that'll slice through even the thickest pizzas. It's got a piece to protect your hands when it's not in use and is easy to disassemble and clean.

$18 .75

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#35

Boxes In Boxes In Boxes Prank Gift Box

There's always that one box at the Dirty Santa giveaway that's super large. This year, you can bring it. And what will be hidden inside? The recipient's worst nightmare...or maybe their best friend if they have some packages to ship. There are six boxes in this prank box...and nothing else.

$56 .99

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#36

Meh Christmas Tree Ornament

This ornament is fine, it's like ok, nothing about it really stands out, other than the fact that it's black. It's neither the most wonderful nor the least wonderful time of the year, according to this ornament it's the meh-st wonderful time of the year.

$10 .95

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#37

Bob Ross Heat Reactive Mug

Enjoy some happy little trees the whole year round with a heat-reactive mug featuring none other than the man, the myth, the legend of chill himself, Bob Ross. When you make your hot cocoa in the mug, the black fades to reveal a beautiful landscape.

$19 .95

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#38

Headband Hoop Party Game

Knock back a couple of mugs of egg nog and put this party hat on and you'll be in for a rip-roaring good time. The headband hoop game is fun for the whole family but leave the kids at home and you might fun that getting drunk leads to better dunks.

$22 .99

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#39

Infused Cocktail Ice Cubes

Spice up your cocktails with a little more than Christmas cheer with a set of infused cocktail ice cubes that keep it cold but won't ever water it down. There are 12 cubes in these packs, which will add subtle fruit flavor and spice to your favorite drinks.

$25 .00

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#40

Mini Pancake Maker

Start a new Christmas morning tradition with a petite machine that makes silver bell (make that silver dollar) sized pancakes. The Dash mini cranks out 4" pancakes in a matter of minutes and saves the mess and unpredictability of the griddle.

$10 .99

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#41

The Before and After Wine and Coffee Glass

Realistically this two-sided glass could also be titled "before the in-laws come over" and "after the in-laws come over" but we're not trying to split hairs. Coffee or wine, or both at the same time, this novelty glass has your back.

$19 .99

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#42

We Are Happy to Serve You NYC Ceramic Coffee Mug

Fugettabout other coffee mugs, this is the one, the only, the best one on the entire face of the Earth. The mug holds 10oz of coffee, seltzer (a New Yorker's favorite drink), or an assortment of pens and pencils.

$12 .97

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#43

DIY Fortune Cookie Kit

Santa's gonna get some good cookies when the person at Dirty Santa opens this gift. It's fun and engaging, and a welcome change from those boring sugar cookies that literally everyone makes. All the ingredients are included, as well as the paper slips for you to write your best fortunes.

$37 .99

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#44

T-Rex Surprise Coffee Mug

With this mug, you'll be roaring around the Christmas tree. Deck the T-Rex with a bunch of hot cocoa and start sipping, hidden in the base of the ceramic mug is a sculpture that'll delight any child at heart.

$15 .99

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#45

Giant Inflatable Snowman Sled

They don't call it a Dirty Santa swap for nothing, and you can make all the jokes about face-sitting on Frosty as you want when you unwrap this snow tube. The oversized tube will send you sailing down the slopes and doubles as a pool float for your Christmas in July party.

$25 .50

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