33 Ridiculously Funny Calendars That'll Make You LOL Every Day And Month

Things That Can Kill You Funny Calendar

There are a lot of ways to die, don't you just wish you knew about more of them? From getting bonked with a coconut to falling out of a roller coaster, this calendar will make you acutely aware of reasons you should never go to the fair and how finite life really is.

$14 .99

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#2

Zero F*cks Daily Calendar

Have a f*ck left to give? In this economy? Please. This calendar will inspire you to live your best do-nothing life both in and out of the office. It's a daily dose of reminders that you're f*cking great just doing your thing and vibing, you don't need to actually DO anything to prove your worth.

$12 .14

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#3

Demotivational Wall Calendar

Some people are more motivated by negative self-talk than positive self-talk and this calendar is for those people. The Demotivational calendar is devoid of all positivity and hope and really anything good, but it might just inspire you to seek that motivation elsewhere.

$12 .95

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#4

Overworked and Underintoxicated Calendar

With Mad Men-era graphics and Mad Men-era sentiments filling every page, this calendar might make you wish you were working in the office with Don Draper. At least then you'd be overworked and underintoxicated...until whenever Don decided to break out the whiskey.

$14 .99

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#5

P*rn For Women Calendar

Ladies love chiseled abs, but you know what they love even more? A guy who knows how to load the dishwasher properly. Or a guy who cleans the f*cking bathroom now and then. In the P*rn for Women calendar, instead of hot dudes, a lady will be treated to delightful guys doing housework and looking happy doing it.

$19 .99

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#6

Awkward Family Photos Calendar

If you thought the photos your family took circa 1995, you ain't seen nothing yet. Awkward Family Photos is a next-level collection of the most cringeworthy, grimace-face emoji-inducing images you'll ever see. And they're all collected here in one place for you to laugh at.

$12 .60

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#7

The 365 Stupidest Things Ever Said

Making this calendar had to take a lot of work. There have been a lot of dumb things said over the course of history, and to boil it down to only 365 of them? Whew, what a task. Enjoy them and tell your friends about them by treating yourself to this calendar.

$11 .47

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#8

Nature’s Dick Pics Calendar

Mother Earth is a naughty, naughty girl and she's been showing us dick pics for as long as the world's been turning. Every month you'll get to see a new phallus on full display, in stunning color, and fully erect, totally safe for work, because that's the way nature made it.

$19 .99

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#9

Inspiration Blastoff Calendar: Brilliant Sayings and Kick-Ass Graphics

Dogs, cats, landscapes, is all that stuff boring AF or what? To really start your day off rocking, Inspiration Blastoff is what you need. From koalas riding sandwiches into space to bears riding vespas, if you think you've seen it all, you haven't until you've seen this calendar.

$24 .24

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#10

Tricks to Appear Smart in Meetings Day Calendar

Not only will "Tricks to Appear Smart in Meetings" make you look better and better every day over the course of a year, it'll also make you LOL. By the time you've torn off all 365 of its pages, your boss will think you're amazing and you'll have reduce your stress levels through chuckling.

$15 .99

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#11

A Fcking Wall Calendar: Get Your Sht Together This Year

Next year is going to be your year, especially with this f*cking wall calendar hanging in a place where you can see it will. You will get your sh*t together as the months progress, the empowering but sweary messages on each page will make you feel like you can do anything. Even schedule the dentist appointment you've been putting off.

$14 .99

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#12

The Quotable A**hole Calendar

There are well-known a**holes like Joseph Stalin and Mark Twain, but then there are lesser-known a**holes like Walt Disney and Audrey Hepburn. Just kidding, those people aren't really a**holes, they just lost their cool here and there, but you can enjoy their caustic remarks and many more in this daily calendar.

$41 .76

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#13

You Had ONE JOB! Funny Calendar

The popular Internet meme comes alive in calendar form with You Had One Job! Enjoy a series of pictures that'll make you glad you weren't the person who bombed an easy task so hard it wound up in this calendar.

$27 .12

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#14

Men to Avoid in Art and Life Wall Calendar

Ladies, this calendar will probably make you think of at least a dozen messages you've gotten on your Tinder profile. Gents, this calendar will teach you how not to be an asshole. It's all in good fun, hilarity, and great art.

$12 .01

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#15

365 Facts That Will Scare the S#*t Out of You

Skip the fiber gummies, they taste weird anyway, all you need to clear the intestinal decks in the morning is a page from this calendar. These facts are so unnerving and so unsettling that your bowels will want to escape.

$28 .99

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#16

F in Exams Funny Calendar

Teachers need a little extra help getting through the day as the school year progresses and the F in Exams Calendar will give them the spark that they need. The daily calendar is filled with 365 days of epic student fails that'll have them LOLing so hard they might be late to class.

$7 .19

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#17

Some eCards Wall Calendar

Don't let your boss see this calendar. Or do let him see it, he probably agrees with the passive-aggressive and sometimes NSFW sentiments printed on the monthly images. He may be your manager, but office feels about people that say "Happy Monday" are universal.

$9 .81

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#18

People of Wal-Mart Day-to-Day Funny Calendar

People of Wal-Mart are piss-your-pants funny so there's gonna be a clean-up on aisle You every time you check out a new pic in this calendar. There are 365 days of nothing but the weirdest, wildest, wackiest, and most NSFW things you've ever seen.

$42 .00

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#19

Dogs Pooping Calendar

If you're not lucky enough to have a dog that stares up at you while it's taking a deuce every morning, you need Pooping Pooches even more. The calendar features twelve dogs dumping their load in various locales, ranging from gorgeous lakes to majestic mountain ranges.

$16 .99

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#20

Sh*t My Kids Say Boxed Funny Calendar

The mouths of babes have been responsible for some of the sassiest, most inadvertently inappropriate, and cringeworthy comments known to man. This calendar has collected 365 of kids' most quotable quotes for your daily enjoyment.

$6 .49

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#21

Nuns Having Fun Funny Calendar

Contrary to popular belief, nuns DO have fun. In fact, they probably have more fun than you do and this calendar proves it. Enjoy their adventures to the drive-in, play-acting as the Rockettes, and trying their hands as models in Project Nun-way.

$14 .99

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#22

Kilty Pleasures Funny Calendar

Ladies that are still thirsty about that dude from Outlander will find the gents in this Kilty Pleasures calendar mouthwateringly delicious. Every month is a new hottie with a body clad in tartan looking tastier than a shortbread cookie.

$12 .98

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#23

Effin Birds Day-to-Day Calendar

Effin' Birds is, as the kids say, a Big Mood. Every time you tear one of the pieces of paper off of this day-to-day calendar, you'll feel a little more of it deep in your soul. Every day features a new bird spewing a new vulgarity that will resonate in every inch of your being.

$29 .99

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#24

Texts from Mittens the Cat Funny Calendar

Mittens has opinions and you're going to have to hear them whether you want to or not with this calendar on your desk. Straight from the cat's paws and the cat's mouth, Texts for Mittens imagines a world in which the cute calico could text and the result will make you wish it was real.

$39 .30

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#25

Calm the F*ck Down Adult Coloring Calendar

Find some f*cking chill in the new year with a monthly calendar that doubles as a coloring book. Not only that, the pictures are full of swear words because swearing always helps.

$13 .94

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#26

Stoner Sloths Funny Calendar

Sloths like to do their part for the green movement, and they'll gladly show that to you every month in the Stoner Sloths calendar. Wait, did you think we meant "green movement" as in eco-friendly? Nope, these fuzzy boys like to hit the bong.

$132 .99

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#27

Unforgettale Senior Moments Funny Calendar

Even if you aren't over 65, this is a safe place to admit that you can't remember what day it is. Youngun's and oldun's alike will get a kick out of Senior Moments, a calendar filled with anecdotes about the golden years that are unforgettably funny.

$40 .50

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#28

Chuck Norris Wall Calendar

Chuck Norris doesn't need a calendar, the Earth just shifts to be whatever day he wants it to be. You, unfortunately, are not Chuck Norris and you do need a calendar, but you'll feel al little more bad ass with this one on your wall.

$35 .52

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#29

Dog Shaming Calendar

When dogs are naughty, it's a unique kind of hilarious. From toy poodles that toyed with too much toilet paper to mischievous mutts that destroyed the couch cushions, you'll enjoy 365 days of dogs and their owners confessing their sins in a funny and adorable fashion.

$14 .99

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#30

Jokes You Can't Tell Your Mother Funny Calendar

Sorry moms, these jokes are for dad's ears only. Each of the 365 in the collection aren't necessarily off-color or vulgar, but they're all the sort that would make your mother throw something at you and call you by your middle name.

$40 .56

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#31

Outhouses Yearly Funny Calendar

You've never seen architecture and landscape design like you've seen it in Outhouses. The calendar highlights the majesty of mountain ranges as the backdrop of...outhouses. Yup, they can be pretty, who knew?

$16 .99

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#32

Kittendales Hot Guys and Kitties Calendar

Screw the thunder down under (figuratively or literally, that's up to you), but Kittendales is where it's really at. Treat a lady that fancies felines and fantastic-looking men to a calendar that will grace their eyes with both every day.

$35 .28

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#33

Did You Know? Day-to-Day Calendar: 63 Earths Can Fit Inside Uranus

The humor in this day-to-day calendar is dad-joke level cringey and that's what makes it great. Learn a new fact every day with a side of punderful wordplay that'll make those morsels of information stick to your brain like glue.

$21 .30

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#34

The Daily B*tch Day-to-Day Calendar

Women with a sassy will trust the B on every single page of the Daily B*tch. The day-to-day calendar is rife with laugh-your-ass-off anecdotes, relatable humor, and crass remarks that might slip between the lips of your favorite drama queen.

$50 .18

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#35

Texts from Dog Day-to-Day Calendar

If your dog could text, what would he say? The makers of Texts from Dog know! The daily calendar is a straight-from-Tumblr collection of the funniest full-color panels of situations illustrated by the texts of a grumpy English bulldog.

$36 .94

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#36

Goats in Trees Funny Calendar

Are these goats being baaaaaah-d or are they just doing what they do? Turns out goats just like hanging out in trees and this calendar celebrates their odd hobby. Every month you can ponder and puzzle over the animals and their strange affinity for just standing there on the branches.

$46 .32

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#37

Jack*sses and the Things They Say Funny Calendar

If you heard the title of this calendar, you might think that it's something that would make your most prudish coworker clutch her pearls, but you would be wrong. Instead, Jackasses features a herd of hilarious four-legged friends teasing each other about things like lost keys.

$41 .07

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#38

Drinking with Chickens Wall Calendar

Kate E. Richards loves cocktails and she loves chickens. Both are on display in the boldest and most beautiful way in Drinking with Chickens. Each picture showcases another happy hen hanging out with an alcoholic beverage, always in a situation with lots of color. It'll make you smile every time you see it.

$85 .27

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#39

Shakespearean Insults Calendar

Is it just us or is calling someone a "dumbass" and telling them to "eat a d*ck" getting really old? Spice up your insult game with 365 pages of Shakespeare's best pointed remarks. "F*ck you" just won't hit the same once you start dropping these outlandishly awesome statements.

$25 .89

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#40

You Might Be a Redneck If Funny Calendar

You might be a redneck if you enjoy the humor in this calendar, and that's awesome because Jeff Foxworthy's redneck jokes are some of the most knee-slapping in the history of jokes. Enjoy a daily dose of some backcountry humor for all 365 days of the year with this calendar.

$15 .99

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#41

Fat Cats Wall Calendar

Lorge chonky cats will always be hilarious, but these megachonkers are especially good for laughs. Every month features a new cat screaming something about getting fed, which'll make you look forward to the passing of time with an "oh lawd, him a'comin" attitude.

$8 .06

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#42

Animals Being Derps Day-to-Day Calendar

Goofy animal faces will never not be an absolute joy. In Animals Being Derps, you'll be treated to 365 days of their best worst faces, sun's out tongue's out moments, and weirdest poses. You might even find yourself tacking a few to your bulletin board to gaze upon in years to come.

$16 .45

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#43

Uncle John's Bathroom Reader Funny Calendar

You may not have thought of putting a calendar in the bathroom, but Uncle John did and you'll want to thank him for that. Instead of staring mindlessly at your phone, you can enjoy a new joke, puzzle, or fun fact on each of the calendar's 365 pages.

$11 .08

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#44

Cats on Catnip Wall Calendar

Cats on Catnip is a far more work-friendly calendar than a homemade version of selfies of your buddy high on a different kind of green. Enjoy myriad bleps, derps, and other fantastic faces of stoned cats with this hilarious calendar.

$12 .02

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#45

Crapping Cats Calendar

Cats look personally offended when you catch them in the cat box, but something feels oh-so-satisfying about catching the mischievous dudes in the act. In Crapping Cats, you don't have to deal with the smell of cat crap or cleaning out the box, you can get laughs just by looking at a new picture every month.

$18 .99

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#46

I Could Pee on This Kitten Wall Calendar

If you have a cat, this calendar will help you in more ways than just making you laugh. I Could Pee On This is a monthly reminder of all the place you would never think your cat would pee, so you have a reason to check there to see if they did actually spray it down.

$21 .95

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#47

Farmer to Table Fresh Hunks Calendar

You can make all the jokes you want about farmers and bad fashion choices, but you can't deny that Body by Hay Bale is a damn fine workout. Enjoy the chiseled abs and bright smiles of the fruit and veg toting gents in this manly monthly calendar.

$13 .99

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#48

Gettin' Squirrelly Funny Box Calendar

Get a little bit nutty in the new year with a daily calendar full of nuts. Every page features a new fun-loving rodent in a zany situation. They keep it real, they keep it adorable, and they keep it safe for work.

$17 .28

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#49

Underwater Dogs Calendar

The mix of awe and "aww" that this calendar holds is a magical blend that you won't find anywhere else. With a little help from an underwater camera, some of a pup's most profoundly funny faces have been captured.

$14 .99

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#50

The Office Wall Calendar

There's a good chance that you, like the office dwellers at Dunder Mifflin Scranton, while away the hours wondering WTF you're doing sitting at your desk and just trying to make sales. If you don't have a boss like Michael Scott, there's no better calendar than this one to celebrate that you're sitting where you are instead of Scranton.

$17 .99

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#51

The Grumpy Cat Calendar

The world's most famous cat is back for another year of entertaining with witty remarks, sarcastic jibes, and cantankerous comedy that'll have you yowling like a cat that just sniffed some catnip. Enjoy his frown, it'll turn yours upside down.

$18 .47

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#52

Bob's Burgers Wall Calendar

If you read every day in Linda Belcher's voice, this calendar will make you laugh even harder. The pictures are bright and bold and grand celebration of one of America's most beloved families. And, the calendar is complete with stickers you can put on your favorite days.

$38 .26

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#53

Cat Shaming Day-to-Day Funny Calendar

Cats DGAF. They never have and they never will. They've done wrong and they'll do wrong again. It doesn't matter how many times you shame them for being d*cks, they're gonna turn right back around and be a d*ck again.

$35 .16

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#54

We Rate Dogs Day-to-Day Calendar

WeRateDogs is one of the Internet's treasures, renowned for its ability to brighten days and make humans cry tears of joy. The fun continues offline in this daily calendar, filled with happy pups and silly ratings that garner a 14/10 for awesomeness.

$15 .99

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#55

Bad Cat a Day Funny Calendar

When cats are bad, they're really really bad. We're talking like "shredded the curtains" bad or "licked their butthole and then licked your face" bad. That's why this daily calendar will make you roll your eyes, and then chance a kiss from Mr. Jingles, who may have just licked his butthole.

$15 .99

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#56

Crusoe the Celebrity Dachsund

Crusoe the Dachsund is happy to help you live your life vicariously through his antics. He's cruisin' around living his best dog life and getting into zany situations and puppy shenanigans that'll surprise and delight every month.

$13 .79

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